To honk or not to honk? That's the question posed to us this week by Jacob out in Redding, California. Jacob thinks drivers who cut him off on the freeway need to be put on notice that they've done a bad thing, with a quick beep. His Dad, however, takes a Zen approach, and thinks Jacob should just let them be. So, they asked us to mediate.
Ray agrees with Jacob, but would add a quick finger wag to help punctuate the horn. Tommy however, has a less passive response, which is likely to result in a 911 call. Who do you side with? Zen Dad, Reasonable Raymie, or Nutso Tommy? Share your thoughts here, and listen to the call here.
I cannot tell you how many times I have come close to being hit by someone merging onto the expressway. Nine time out of ten the other driver is on a cell phone, wearing headphones, driving some monster vehicle without a care that there are other drivers near him or her, or going three times the speed of the bumper to bumper traffic that is already on the expressway. At the entrances onto the expressway that I frequent in Illinois there are no Yield signs whatsoever. The vehicle doing the entering onto the expressway is the one who needs to yield. This is basic rules of the road. In the cases where merging left is not an option by the vehicle on the expressway, the vehicle entering the expressway needs to either slow down or stop before entering the expressway. The people to the rear of that guy need to pay attention.
I am also tired of people not merging to the left at expressway entrances. For every time I have had to stop while on the expressway because of someone entering the expressway I have had to come to a complete stop because some other idiot who is so important that he cannot get of the phone to drive did not get into the left lane.
In all instances, I am applying the brakes and the horn with equal strength and fright. I think the biggest thing that would help with driver etiquette is the nation-wide ban on driving while talking on a cell phone. I can barely listen to the radio and drive at the same time let alone talk on the phone. Whatever happened to the basic rules of the road? Whatever happened to common courtesy especially on the road? I think the response should be a hefty ticket from a state cop, in lieu of that, something in between a 911 call and a gentle tap to the horn.
My girlfriend and I were listening to this episode (as we always do), and she immediately looked at me and giggled when we heard this caller ring in. She knows I love to be horn friendly, quickly pointing out any less-than-ideal maneuver from other drivers. If it's there, use it! People need to be told when they aren't doing something properly! After all, what's required for someone to drive on the road these days? --A pulse!
A warning horn to keep cars from colliding is all I think a horn is for, leave the policeing for the police. and while the-single-finger-salute is tempting, it only makes a bad thing worse.
My wife, always accuses me of a bit more than a finger "wag" when mergers don't yield. However, after listening to the discussion, it occured to me that since I've been in northern Florida, for the past few years, this has happened to me more frequently than I recall. I just realized why. There are no yield signs on any on ramps in our gun toting area {Jacksonville], so I guess the answer is that our drivers are so sophisticated, they practice the European policy of "priority right", and expect us who are traveling at 75 MPH, to stop and let their 30MPH merge occur.
Live and Learn.
Len Kurtz
The other day I was very nearly T-boned at a 4-way stop by a driver who not only did not stop at the sign, but apparently was too distracted to even look forward to notice my car in the intersection.
every situation is different...
If you are put at serious risk, for example, you have to swerve or brake very hard, then I'd say go for the honk and the finger... the other driver might not have even realized they were doing something wrong and that might help them in the future, or if they are being intentionally aggressive the horn will alert other drivers in the immediate vicinity that something is happening.
If you're cut off and just need to stop accelerating, or it's otherwise "not a big deal", then just let it go, it's not worth your stress
I'm with Dad. There are 2 possibilities; 1) the offender does not know he cut you off and would not have had he known or 2) he's perfectly aware of his transgression and doesn't give a #%^^&. In either case, any action on your part serves no purpose. In the latter case, the honk and finger wag can escallate into less genial hand gestures and from there into participation into an international incident involving the Israilies, the Palestinians, the North Koreans, the Republicans and the Democrats.
Having said that, I really like Tommy's approach except that you then spend untold numbers of hours filling out insurance claim forms and trying (unsuccessfully) to convince the court-appointed psychiatrist that you do not need to be institutionalized. Bummer.
We have all had our fill of bozos who bought their driver's liscence at Sears. What scares me now is the increasing use of cel phones while driving. There is evidence that when talking, any talking, the part of the brain we use for driving turns off and the part we use for talking turns on. Apparently the two parts don't like to work at the same time. End result is there are a lot more really stupid drivers on the road and the only functional solution is to slow down and drive as defensively as possible. This, rest assured will piss pretty much all the other drivers off. You are making amends by non-violently protesting the actions of the few to the detriment of all the other idiots on the road. I make a practice of this. I've gotten the one finger salute use down to maybe only once or twice a a day. I never use the horn so i can't remember where it is in time for it to be of much use, and by the time I get the hand up to salute, the other guy is usually in a position where he (or she) can't see it anyway. Does what it's intended to do though, and I move on. Not exactly zen, but so far I haven't gotten into too much trouble.
Add crystal meth to the equation and it probably isn't a real good idea to make a practice of flipping other drivers off. There is no telling what an ice-head will do. You do not want to get mixed up with that.
What gives a person a right to "correct" anyone else's driving? We all drive like jerks, no one is perfect, it's humanly impossible. That person who cut Jacob off could care less what Jacob thinks of his driving. And, worse, he could get angry and might do something in retaliation or worse. I hate these people who think they have to teach other people a lesson. No one cares what a complete stranger thinks of them.
I say let it go, chances are you will never see that person again. Perhaps, like what was said on the show, the person just was distracted at that time and place.
I just wanted to say that I know people who were in the habit of "correcting" people on the road. I won't go into details, but most of those people who did the "correcting" have died in car accidents.
I usually go with a finger, but it's not the finger they suggested. Of course, I do NOT have a Zen approach to driving in any way. :)
As to Tom & Ray's other statement that the bigger vehicle has the right-of-way, I once experienced exactly the opposite phenomenon. In 1992 I was attending truck driving school. It was my turn behind the wheel with our instructor in the jump seat (with his own wheel, just in case) when I was cut off when I had the right-of-way, by a Ford Festiva. Those had to be the smallest, flimsiest tin cans on the road since the demise of the Yugo. Yet he cut off an 18-wheeler. Not JUST an 18-wheeler, but an 18-wheeler that said "Fort Scott/Kansas City Kansas Truck Driving School" on the side and "Student Driver" on the back. I'm not sure if the guy was, A) cocky, B) stupid or C) suicidal but it made enough of an impression on me that I still remember it clearly 16 years later.
Zen Dad, definitely. Anything else could just promote road rage and things could get really ugly.
Someone else, who can't control his anger, will eventually choose differently, but don't let that be you.
Good anger management, and the acknowledgment that we are not necessarily in a place to judge others when we don't know their situation.
For what it's worth, at 100 yards from where I sit there is a freeway entrance (55mph) with a STOP sign at the end of it. I think that's difficult and dangerous, but PENNDOT believes that reasonable.
You two are Dingbats but that's the fun of your show. It's the others on here who make me wonder how many drivers it takes to change a lane.
The law is that the driver changing lanes fits into the traffic flow -- carefully. The "Ben Hur" approach (buzz saws attached to the chariot axles), or the "line of scrimmage" method ("may the smaller vehicle rest in pieces"), is rude, criminal, ignorant, dangerous, irresponsible, and reckless (but not "wreckless"). Anyway, the Buddist has the only sensible solution. When they demonstrate total ignorance stop the lecture, please! It's driving, Bubsy -- not bumper cars. Excuse the pun but a one-finger salute is pointless. At that "point" you're just acting out, yourself.
Maybe the offending driver was from NJ. Here in NJ they teach new drivers to speed up on the entrance ramp. The drivers on the highway are supposed to move over IF they can to let the merging driver on. I like it this way. But many NJ drivers don't know the law....
Although I would recommend not responding derogatively particularly while driving, I can't say I deployed this methodology this week. John Carson used to joke that he saw a bumper sticker, " Ibrake to reload." I coined a new term "ATM road rage." I was behind a guy at the bank ATM, and this New Yorker (visiting NJ -there ought to be a law) in a BMW SUV was yelling at his speaker car phone while very slowly doing a multitude of withdrawals and deposits. Probably a drug dealer. Now I'm boxed in on all sides so I gave him the horn and yelled at him to speed it up. I was met by a plethera of cursing. The bank manager came out and asked what was going on. Hey, I have an eight year old 4 ton van versus and would not hesitate to use it.. In these cases the offending party thinks he is the injured party. As Yul Brenner says in "The Magnificent Seven," "Ride on." And eventually he did.
I did have my cell phone ready with 911.
Michael B.
Toots and fingers? Either one means moves other than both hands on the wheel and good driving technique. I'll mostly side with Zen Dad....for all the good reasons cited above. BUT...so far nobody mentioned yelling as an adequate tension-releasing and substitute for revenge response(although this might not be advisable with passengers, especially children) There's no way Jacob would be able to influence the rude/dangerous driver's behavior by anything he did, short of crashing into him (not recommended) but sometimes ya just gotta yell at the jerks because it helps YOU feel better. After yelling, a couple of deep breaths would help restore the peacefulness so you can go on with your day (until the next jerk comes along!) Ooooohhhhmmmmm....
Here's an admittedly half-baked suggestion--where else is there to go with these types of ideas!?! There should be an anonymous database of license plate numbers from which one could send a form letter/email to the offending driver. There are, among other problems, vindictive exes, privacy and jurisdictional dilemmas, but it seems like a way to cut down on the one-finger salutes.
I think that distracted drivers should be made aware that they are driving in an unsafe manner, when they are merging or any other time. When someone is clearly distracted by their cell phone I will pull up next to the drivers window and lay on the horn...hopefully the person on the other side of the line will tell them to pay attention to the road.
11/09/2008 3:33:31 PM
