To honk or not to honk? That's the question posed to us this week by Jacob out in Redding, California. Jacob thinks drivers who cut him off on the freeway need to be put on notice that they've done a bad thing, with a quick beep. His Dad, however, takes a Zen approach, and thinks Jacob should just let them be. So, they asked us to mediate.
Ray agrees with Jacob, but would add a quick finger wag to help punctuate the horn. Tommy however, has a less passive response, which is likely to result in a 911 call. Who do you side with? Zen Dad, Reasonable Raymie, or Nutso Tommy? Share your thoughts here, and listen to the call here.
On last weeks show a caller asked when to honk and when not to honk or when to give hand jesters. This reminded me of a story I heard recently from a friend of mine, whose name I will change. I felt I just had to share it with you and the other listeners of your show.
A few years ago Sarah had to leave work during the day to get to a doctors appointment across town. She was running late. When she got to the bottom of the on-ramp to the freeway nobody would let her merge. She was honking and trying to cut someone off to get in. Finally she slammed on the gas, cut in front of someone and was in. By now she was furious! She immediately got into the left lane and sped up quickly honking the horn, cursing and giving hand gestures to all those who wouldn’t let her in. After passing several of the vehicles she looked ahead and then realized why nobody would let her in—it was a funeral procession!
Occasionally, in a moment of anger, I have honked my horn at someone. This might happen once or twice a year. I ride a motorcycle almost daily (except rainy/snowy days) and when I see a situation where I think someone might pull out in front of me I get my thumb on the horn button just in case, but again I only actually use the horn once or twice a year. Usually by the time I have avoided whatever dumbass thing somebody has done it's too late for the horn to do any good and I don't bother. Sometimes the only time my horn gets used is for the yearly inspection.
This goes along with one of the primary things I tried to instill in my daughters when teaching them to drive. Keep driving the car! If you are sliding on ice or an accident is in the process of happening KEEP DRIVING THE CAR! You may not have a lot of control and it may not help, but for sure you are having an accident if you throw up you hands and give up. Honking the horn does nothing toward controlling your vehicle and only helps if used early enough to prevent someone else from pulling in front of you or changing lanes into you or something like that. And, if you are being cautious in the situations where that might happen you can usually avoid the close calls.
As a former driving instructor, I always taught my student the purpose of the horn was to let people you were there and not to run you over. Not for use in anger, not for use in getting your friends attention, and not for telling your girlfriend to hurry up. TO paraphrase Rene Descartes: "I honk therefore I am!"
The classic W.C. Field movie 1932 movie "If I Had a Million" provides the penultimate incredibly satisfying solution for drivers who cut you off. I think about this movie every time this happens to me.
In the movie, a dying tycoon gives two ex-vaudevilleans a million dollars. Husband and wife W.C. Fields and Alison Skipworth, dismayed that their new car has been destroyed by a "road hog," utilize their million dollars to purchase a fleet of cars and then smash up every road hog in sight!
There have been studies regarding 'Road Rage' and attempting to 'educate'
a rude or dangerous driver are also forms of road rage. Jacob needs to listen to his dad and we all need to take a deep breath and relax.
This links to a Congressional Report by Dr. Leon James on this issue.
Dear Tom and Ray, There are no generally understood hand gestures or toots to convey what I don't like about another driver's behavior.
Meanwhile, nobody obeys "yield" signs any more. Drivers just barrel onto the interstates and expect the drivers already on the big road to yield to them. This behavior is dangerous. Cars moving fast can't always yield.
So let's mount a campaign to restore obedience to "yield" signs, especially on the on-ramps to high-speed roads.
Susan King, Fabius, NY
I think Jacob misses the point of driving in the first place. It is to get you from point A to point B, without mishap. That's it. It is NOT to make a point about manners to other drivers. When you are driving a 3000 pound weapon, safety is first, last, and pretty much everything in between, it seems to me.
Isn't it interesting how badly people treat each other when they're anonymous? I know these people wouldn't cut in front of me in line at the grocery store, at least if anybody was watching. I admit rude and endangering driving GETS MY GOAT and expressing my frustration has gotten me into some very scary road-rage situations. It's hard to out-jerk a jerk!
That said, I do have to say, Seattle drivers (with the usual exceptions of those in giant red trucks and little black sports cars) are amazingly courteous. In heavy traffic here, there is an unspoken rule that each car on the freeway lets in one car that is merging.
But don't get me started on the people who use "exit only" lanes to pass on the right! : )
Just today I was in danger of being overrun by a Chevy truck, large object with a dual rear axle, idiot came out of nowhere (down a ramp I think) crossed all 4 lanes and squeezed beween my rear end and the front of the car in the next lane to the left at a rate of knots that would get anyone a ticket, were they traveling in a straight line, let alone cutting the rear/front of adjacent vehicles. Anyway, most times I let such idiots pass by, but his one for one reason or another prompted me to "lay on the horn", not that he heard.
most times I just get out of the way and thank the lord that there is a bigger idiot out there than I. Case in point.
many moons ago I was heading back home late at night and for one reason or another I noticed I had picked up a cruiser as a tailer.... so there I was on my best behaviour cruising down the highway and sewating bullits with this car on my rear end.... when a toy boy in a slick car speeds down an on-ramp, crosses several lanes and cuts across me and heads for the horizon.... whereupon the cruiser forgets about me and takes off after it in a blaze of lights and sirens...... was I ever so happy.
Cut me off anytime you want... I need idiots like that to protect me.
I am totally in support of ZEN dad. There is way too much testosterone and/or Type A Personalities on the highways, not to mention weapons being carried in vehicles. There are way too many knuckle-heads "asleep at the wheel." When my father was first teaching me to drive, he told me to always expect the unexpected. I know I feel more relaxed behind the wheel whenever I can yield to others (even if I have the right of way). Mind you, I am not immune to anger when drivers change lanes without signaling or do something stupid that could put my life and others' lives at risk, but trying to shame other drivers and get them to own up to their stupidity just drags me down to their level. I'm definitely in favor of taking the high road and ignoring bad behavior.
11/12/2008 9:09:31 PM
